I got back to the studio this weekend after a few weeks not painting. I always hate it when circumstances keep me away from painting for a time. I get so rusty so quickly and instead of painting with the sureness that normally marks my work, even my experiments, I paint tentatively, less surely. It takes a while for the rust to flake off and I hate that feeling of not being as good as I feel I should be. An irrational feeling that I’ll never get back to where I was pops in and out of my mind.

There is no solution. That feeling, and chipping at the rust can only be dealt with by doing the work, plowing through it. There is no other path.

This painting, which I call “Trial by Fire” bothers me. I like it, but I am not sure if it is finished or not. I’ve learned the hard way that often, a single bad paint stroke can ruin a painting that otherwise was on the right track. That may seem like an odd thing for an abstract artist to say, but I’ve seen it happen time and time again, and those who have seen the before and after of the bad stroke have agreed. I should have stopped. At times less is more. Or at least more appealing.

The good news is that that is generally not the case in life. Life has far more grace than we allow it. We get more chances to get it wrong and still, ultimately, get it right. The painting of life is never finished. It can always be layered and re-layered, created and recreated. The new creation might be different than the first one, but it can be just as good, or better, or just another building block to the masterpiece that is our life.

I’ve lived that one, with great successes, and great failures, and always a building towards something better, different, good in a myriad of different ways. Because in life there are a host of different ways to be wonderful. Not perfect – there’ s only one way to be perfect (if such a thing was even possible), but a million ways to wonderful. And what a relief that is! In life, unlike in a painting, we’re never done.

I am in a place of transition in most aspects of my life right now. Nothing is done. Not even close. And unlike how I felt when I was a young man, I am not concerned about it. God will show the way. Life will work out. The universe is as kind as we allow it to be.

So allow it. Let it be kind to you. Let people love you. Let the sun shine through the window and warm you. Don’t fret over perfection. You’re not going to get there. Settle for wonderful.

And as for this painting? I’ll sit on it a day or two and either make changes and let it go. In fact, it’s kind of growing on me.

Be well. Travel Wisely,

Tom