Father’s Day, 2022
They are grown now.
Living far-flung, their lives,
not mine, as it should be.
Far enough away in time and distance
I can look and ask myself, what did I learn?
- Parenting is a big experiment.
There is no “you do this, they do that” to parenting.
Books are theory, or pipe dreams.
I lean towards pipe dreams - Whatever you learn with one will not help you with the next one.
A total fallacy. God has a sense of humor
and he doesn’t like us too confident. - You don’t change your kids. At best
there is a bit of influence. But they are who they are.
They are what they are.
Our job is to not ruin them. - Rules matter less than love.
- Rules matter less than respect.
- Rules matter less than example.
I am not sure what rules are for, really.
Maybe to make us parents feel in control.
It’s a good theory. - Acceptance goes a long way.
- Savor them. They’ll be gone soon enough.
In other words, when all is said and done,
you are changed more than they,
and that’s saying something
and it’s worth it all, the work, the worry,
the sacrifice, the tears and trepidation.
Now, if only those things stopped
when they grew up.
About this poem
Happy Father’s Day!
Yeah, those are my birth kids, many years ago. They are long out of the house. My third kid I did not get until she was an adult, but like my other two, she is a delight in my life. I am blessed.
Tom
Quarry House 